My Friend Just Can't Figure It Out

My friend wrote me an email today and he's still perplexed about why Hillary lost the election. So, I asked him what he thought might be the reason. Here's his reply.

I still haven't figured it out because there's too many reasons for me to consider, but none of them are in her new book - What Happened.

Was it the Russians, or was it WikiLeaks?

Was it John Podesta, or James Comey?

Was it her sexual predator husband, my "right-hand" assistant's husband Carlos Danger?

Was it the subpoena violation, or was it the corrupt Clinton Foundation?

Wast it the Congressional lies, or was it the Benghazi Bungle?

Was it the pay for play, or was it the Travelgate Scandal?

Was it the Whitewater Scandal, or was it the Cattlegate Scandal?

Was it the Troopergate Scandal, or was it the $15 million for Chelsea's apartment bought with foundation money?

Was it Comey's investigation of her private server in a bathroom closet, or was it all the classified emails that weren't secure?

Was it her husband's meeting on the tarmac in Arizona with A.G. Lynch, or was it being given debate questions before the debate?

Was it deleting 30,000 emails off that private server, or was it calling half the nation deplorable?

Was it the rigging of the nomination by the DNC, or was it the Vince Foster death?

Was it the Jennifer Flowers assault, or was it her settlement?

Was it the Paula Jones lawsuit, or was it her settlement?

Was it claiming she was under sniper fire when visiting Boznia, or was it her husband's impeachment?

Was it $6 Billion that was lost while she was S.O.S. in charge of the State Dept., or was it she took for the pardon of Marc Rich?

Maybe it was the signing of the UraniumOne deal while S.O.S., or maybe it was her husband's getting $500,000 for a 20 minute speech, or maybe it was the $145 million their foundation got from the Sythious group for the UraniumOne deal to give Russia a 20% control of U.S. uranium mine in our country, but they get to control!

Gee, I just can't quite put my finger on it, can you? I know it's got to be right in front of me!