Monday, October 8, 2018

Identity Politics Run Amuck

Its been snowing all night so,

8:00 am - I made a snowman.

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender ma..wom...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burqa.

8:40 - The Police arrive saying someone has been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from the ABC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I am asked if I have any accomplices. My children are taken by social services.

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the world in which we live today and it is going to get much worse.

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